


swallow nostalgia, chase it with lime

by heistsociety



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 5 Times, Canonical Character Death, basically i'm trash for the black family, excessive use of lowercase
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-06-25
Packaged: 2018-11-18 23:11:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11300781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heistsociety/pseuds/heistsociety
Summary: so this was what war did. it tore families apart and didn't allow them to piece themselves back together.or, five times draco malfoy doesn't quite find out about nymphadora tonks, and the one time he does.





	swallow nostalgia, chase it with lime

**Author's Note:**

> this is unedited. i'll probably look over it later and try to correct my errors. until then, enjoy this mess of a fic in which i decided that capitalization was unnecessary.

_ i. the meeting _

there's a girl in diagon alley that keeps looking draco's way. she seems a tad skittish and is nursing a butterbeer, her eyes darting around like she's trying to decide whether or not to approach the boy. she looks vaguely familiar, cropped pink hair surrounding a face that draco could've sworn he's seen before. 

he tires of her nervousness after a while, sliding toward the bookshelf that she's standing by and almost relishing in the little jump she makes when she sees that he's neared her. she tries for a certain air of nonchalance that draco doesn't believe in the slightest. "you know," he says, and she jumps again, eyes going wide. "if you're going to stare at me, you might as well try to make it more subtle." he raises an eyebrow at her.

her eyes steel and she mutters something under her breath that he doesn't quite catch. "i didn't know whether you knew who i was."

draco frowns, wracking his brain. "am i supposed to?" was she a family friend, perhaps? some girl that his father wanted him to consider for marriage?

the girl smiles thinly. "your parents haven't sat you down and talked to you about my mother then, i suppose."

"what?" the girl already looks to be older than him. her mother... what is draco supposed to know about her mother? 

"never mind," she answers, already beginning to move away.

"wait, but-" draco's curiosity is piqued, but she's disappeared into the crowd. "what the  _ bloody hell? _ " he mutters under his breath.

 

_ ii. the question _

that night, he gathers the courage to ask his mother about it. the malfoy family isn't regularly one for questions, but his mother, at least, has always been a far more approachable person. he begins with, "something strange happened to me at diagon alley."

narcissa raises a single eyebrow - a malfoy signature - and glances over at him. "hm?"

draco allows his fingers to trail across the table of the sitting room. "this girl talked to me. she had- ah, pink hair. said something about how you hadn't sat me down and told me about her mother." he raises his eyes to meet his mother's and is surprised to find that she looks as though she's been punched in the gut.

" _ what?" _ she looks pale.

"she said-" draco begins, but narcissa interrupts him.

"don't talk to her, okay? and don't ask me about her again." 

draco wasn't expecting this strong of a reaction, and it only furthers his curiosity. but he knows better than to push his parents when they tell him to stop. "okay," he answers.

"don't ask  _ anyone _ about her. not your father, and  _ especially _ not your aunt bellatrix," narcissa continues, tone harsh.

draco can't imagine a scenario where he would ever want to talk to his aunt bellatrix, but he nods anyway.

 

_ iii. the sighting _

he sees her again when the war is underway. it's in diagon alley again. sixth year is about to begin and draco's just exited from borgin & burkes. he's with his father and he spots a whirl of now-blue hair in the diagon alley crowd. he can still tell that it's her. he's curious. so, so curious. malfoys keep secrets; it's what they do. draco is used to it, but that doesn't mean that he likes it. and whoever this girl is, it's clear that she has the answers. but his mother's warnings flit through his mind.  _ don't talk to her _ followed by  _ don't ask your father about her _ . 

he chooses his own self-preservation over satiating his curiosity. 

that doesn't stop him from watching her as she walks through the alley, silently begging his mind to somehow attach her face to a name.

it doesn't work.

 

_ iv. the conversation _

the summer before draco's seventh year, he and the mysterious girl run into each other on a street in wizard london. it's an accident; draco isn't supposed to be out of the house, but it was starting to feel more like a prison than a home. (not that it had ever felt like a home, really.)

"you," he says. it sounds accusing and breathless.

the girl looks at him like he's a wild animal - one false move and he'll bite her head off. it might be true. "me," she answers warily.

"who the  _ hell _ are you?" there are alarm bells ringing in his head. he's not supposed to be having this conversation. but draco's already knee-deep in death and dark magic. he might as well add this to the list of rules he's broken.

"i'm a-" she looks as though she's at a loss for words. "it doesn't matter. what matters is that this isn't the only path you can take."

" _ what?" _ this girl is getting stranger and stranger. this was the path that draco was bred for.

she presses a paper into draco's hand and casts her eyes around. "i have to go. call me if you ever want a change, yeah?" 

she disapparates, leaving draco with more questions than ever. he carefully unfolds the paper and finds a series of numbers written on it. he can only assume that they're for a muggle phone. at once, he wants to throw it away and call. 

he doesn't have a phone, though, so he settles for stuffing it in his pocket and forgetting about it.

 

_ v. the war _

it isn't until the battle of hogwarts that draco's mind begins to paint a clear picture. he sees the girl mid-battle, fighting for the other side.  _ this isn't the only path you can take _ , she'd told him. perhaps it wasn't. and perhaps if draco had called the number, everything would be different. but he didn't, and-

 

_ i. the meeting _

the order of the phoenix wins, but it feels like a loss to both sides. draco finds out that his aunt bellatrix is dead first, but he can't bring himself to feel bad about it. he feels more numb than anything. bellatrix may have been a blood relative, but that doesn't erase the image of her cackling mouth from his mind, the wand pressed up against his neck in one of her less lucid spells.

there's more of a pang when he sees the girl laid out on a stretcher, hands two inches away from remus lupin's, as though they'd died holding onto each other. her hair is purple, but her face is the same. draco may have to resign himself to never knowing what happened.

except-

there's a woman standing by the stretchers, face stained with tears. draco can feel the grief radiating off of her. at first glance, she doesn't look much like the girl, but draco slowly begins to pick out the similarities. the same eyes, the same high-arched cheekbones, the same brave expression. there's someone else that the woman reminds him of too, but he's not quite sure who it is. clearly, though, this is the mysterious mother that draco never found out about. he wants to approach, but there's a fear that holds him back. he was a part of the reason this woman's daughter died. he's not sure she'll want to speak to him.

he's about to move away when she catches sight of him and beckons him over. he moves toward her hesitantly, and then stays a respectable distance away. 

"do you know who i am?" the woman asks, looking at her daughter instead of him.

"no," draco answers. he's surprised to find that his voice sounds shaky.

"i expected as much. nymphadora said she tried to talk to you, but-" her words are cut off by a sob and draco stands awkwardly, not sure how to comfort her. she regains her posture and continues. "my name is andromeda. andromeda tonks." the name rings a bell, but draco's not quite sure why. "and this is nymphadora. biologically, she's your cousin."

this comes to draco as a lightning shock. family means everything to the pureblood lineage, and yet he's never once heard of andromeda or nymphadora. he wants to laugh, like it's a joke, but then he realizes who else the woman reminds him of. his aunt bellatrix, heavily - same hair, same eyes - and his mother, slightly - same posture, same smile. he's not sure how he didn't see it before. "why didn't i know about you before?" he asks.

"i was disowned," she answers warily. "i married a muggleborn, and-" she shakes her head. "i haven't talked to your mother or your aunt in years, and now-" her eyes travel to where bellatrix's body is. "it's only your mother and i left."

_so this was what war did. it tore families apart and didn't allow them to piece themselves back together_. "i'm sorry," he offers. it's not much, but andromeda seems to take it in stride.

the woman - his aunt -  _andromeda_ \- seems about ready to leave when draco feels a presence at his back. "andromeda?" asks his mother.

"narcissa," andromeda smiles, tearily and tight-lipped.

"andy, i-" his mother inhales deeply. "i'm sorry."

_ or, perhaps, war was the glue that allowed families to piece themselves back together. _


End file.
